kettlebell snatches

Just couldnt bring myself to go to golds today as much as I thought I would after saturday.Knowing for sure now benches and squats just freaking HURT my knees back and shoulders with almost any real loads. So of course I couldnt stop thinking about snatching. Is that out for good too?
The more I tried to talk myself into getting into bulking a bit again the less I wanted to actually do it. It just feels shitty . This has been my classic training conflict since the begining. Love how I feel lean and conditioned and SMALL but hate how I look. Hate how I feel pumped up but like how I look.People respond so differently too. from 125 ultramarathoner to 175 bodybuilder 2.5 times in 1977. Nuts. OCD is so much fun.

snatch
18x10/10
36x6/6x2 wearing my ol shoes, so much easier.
44x6/6x2

53x5/5x5 not bad at all. really scared about the shoulder but it was fine and I really concentrated on going with the hips. the shoes put me in a better lumbar position which lets me use my hips and legs more. IF my knees will tolerate it though.
44x10/10x2 wow. snatches is some hard ass work. I hadnt forgotten but its another thing to feel

114 total reps above 44#

DARCS ( with ol shoe)
53x30
72x20x2 wow, I am pissant weak in the legs. amazing how quick that went.

kb lunges
36x5/5x3 barefoot

Handstands/scapula pullups
5 sets of 10 seconds and 5x5 pulls

I havent done these in a week and I can tell . these are an essential rehab group for me. really opens up my shoulder girdle.

dats it. Have no idea how long it took,probably 50 minutes.